So, we’ve talked about my deep-seated hatred of group projects, right? And if we have, I’m sure I’ve also mentioned that 75 percent of my classes this semester include group work.

Sigh.

One of those classes revolves around database management. Now, those are words that I understand individually. Hell, I even understand what they mean as a combination.

I do not, however, understand how to manage a database, let alone create one from scratch. Our group project for that class is to pitch our group’s database solution to a company that, for some reason I don’t understand, is currently database solution-less.

Anyway, when it came time to pick our part of the assignment, I chose to be the QA editor and create the marketing scheme and draft the legal statements and disclaimers. At first, I felt like I might have taken on too much. Then, one of the other team members uploaded the first document to be edited. For your reading pleasure, here is a sample of his submission:

            “Synthetic full backup is bit different than the other three backup methods. This method

            utilizes full backup files and differential (or incremental) backup files to create a new full

            backup file while in an offline mode. The advantage is this enables a single file restore

            when system restoration is required.”

Dude. Seriously? This guy explains system backup more easily than I can explain how to put on shoes.

This semester is going to make my GPA drop so hard it should be a bass line for Skrillex.